A Confession

All my life I've been pretty low maintenance. A t-shirt and jeans kind of person. Not one to waste time preening and going through twelve steps to look like I haven't done anything. Well, in college I've grown and changed in a number of ways, and one of them is what I deemed extraneous image enhancement. Style has come to be more important to me because as I'm thinking about my imminent departure from the college world and entrance into the "real" world, appearances matter more and my uniform of dark wash jeans and theater production t-shirts no longer make the cut.

So here's my confession: I really like makeup.

Not so earth shattering, I know, but for the throw on some clothes, do tae kwon do every day kind of girl that I am, it's somewhat incongruous to have made such an abrupt transition. Here's the story.

I'm really into YouTube, and this one musician whose vlogs I watch started dating a beauty guru. It took me about a year of seeing her in his videos to finally go to her channel and watch her videos, but I did, and I really liked them. She's a pretty down to earth person, and in one of her videos she says that she didn't get into makeup until after high school and that she wears it because it is a form of self-expression for her and it makes her feel good. (btw, her channel is missglamorazzi and her name is Ingrid)

This changed things for me. I never thought of makeup as self-expression before. It was just that stuff you were supposed to put on your face for special occasions because it was an extra step in the day. Her videos also explained to me what different the products are and how to use them, and they gave me ideas for my own look.

After getting home from studying abroad (where I completely ran out of the small amount of makeup I did take with me), I got to do a little shopping to replenish, but I brought ideas from Ingrid's videos with me. Since then, it even took a couple months to really get into the pattern of putting on more makeup than my usual every day. (Since high school I'd use a Cover Girl foundation because it was easy and some mascara, maybe eye liner) There was one morning after school started again that I naturally woke up a little extra early and spent that additional time putting on eye shadow, and I felt especially good the rest of the day. It made a difference that I never expected it to.

Now, I'm really literate about makeup. I know what the products are, which brands are good at what, and where to get things. I like trying new products and colors and finding things that work. I like playing with how different elements of makeup can change which features are emphasized and how an entire outfit looks.

I've been reluctant to share my new interest with friends/the world because I don't want to be perceived as a vain, ditzy person. That's not to say that people who like makeup are vain or ditzy, it's just that I'd always felt I had better things to do than take the time to put on more than two or three steps of makeup in the morning. The thing is, I'm still me whether I wear makeup or not, and it's all about expressing myself and deciding what feels right day to day. It doesn't change who I am; my head is still full of academic facts and fandom facts, I just have makeup facts in there, too.

So, yes, I am wearing makeup. And if you ask me about it, I can give you a fuller rundown of what each product is and how I applied it than you'd ever want to hear (unless you do). I think it's fun, I like trying new things, and the colors are pretty.

Today is awesome because I got to walk around in the sunshine.